Galveston, TX & the Northeast

Feb. 1 thru 28, 2021 

Monday, Feb. 1, we hugged our goodbyes to Andy & Linda as we hit the road and headed to Southern Oaks RV Resort in Aransas Pass, TX for a one-night stop over in route to Galveston. While on the road I received a phone call from Kathleen, one of the nurses at Brookdale, my mom’s Assisted Living facility, saying that the end was close, and if we wanted to come visit now would be the time. (That last part was after she lobbied with the Wellness Director for us to be able to visit.) Kathleen said Mom was resting comfortably and was “sleeping like a baby.” Unfortunately I knew it would take a few days for us to orchestrate a visit… we had to get the RV moved to Galveston then make flight arrangements. I called my siblings to advise them of the status of things. When we stopped for the afternoon, Gary checked flight availability for Wednesday and booked flights for us. 

Tuesday, Feb. 2, I received an early morning phone call from Kathleen saying that Mom had passed away. I was glad that she wasn’t suffering any longer, as were my siblings when I called them shortly afterwards, even if it meant that we hadn’t had a chance to see Mom one last time. As a family, we had already decided that it wasn’t necessary for all of us to head to NH. Gary and I would go on ahead and clear out Mom’s studio apartment at Brookdale and make arrangements for her Celebration of Life in NY. 

I find it interesting that we needed to jump through hoops to see Mom at the end of her life but no problem to come in and empty out her apartment after she had passed… one does wonder about the logic of some of these rules. 

Gary and I had (thankfully) an uneventful drive to Galveston and got our tiny home parked in its spot for the next three months. We then called a few other family members to let them know the news of Mom’s passing, and spoke with the funeral home a few times, and tackled laundry. 

With Covid nothing is ever straightforward. To be on the safe side, Gary and I had decided to get a Covid test since we were flying into Boston and spending the night there then traveling up to NH then on to NY. New York had particularly stringent travel restrictions in place. We were able to schedule a Covid test at a local pharmacy in Galveston with results expected in 3 days.

Wednesday, Feb 3, we packed for our trip up north and caught an afternoon flight out of Houston. The airport was bizarrely empty, as was security. Somewhat other worldly… or apocalyptic, which perhaps it is since we were still in the midst of a pandemic. On a comical note… we wanted to get an early dinner at the airport. They had instituted remote (contactless) ordering kiosks… most of which weren’t functioning because the airport was so empty. We sat down at one of the few restaurants open and each ordered a sandwich, fries, and a glass of wine (rather large). The cost with tip? $140. Can you imagine????? I think we paid for all the kiosks! We flew First Class thinking it would be less busy (i.e. safer) than coach. Wrong! I think everyone else had the same idea. First Class was full up and coach was empty. Go figure! We were spending the night at the Logan Hilton, which was handy since we arrived fairly late in the evening. 

Thursday, the 4th, we checked out of the hotel, stopped for a takeout breakfast at Dunkin Donuts and headed directly to Brookdale to start the process of emptying Mom’s apartment. With my Mom being at Brookdale for 6 years, we know several longtime staff members. Many stopped into Mom’s room to offer their condolences. So sweet. They shared how much they had loved her. It gave me comfort to know that mom was so well looked after during her final days. I was blessed with a good relationship with my mom all my life. I took comfort that there was nothing left unsaid between us prior to her death, even if I couldn’t be there at the end. It was a blessing having her in NH these past 6 years. My mom and I hadn’t lived in the same state since Gary and I married 40 years ago. What a treat to be living 20 minutes apart from one another during this final stage of her life. Prior to NH, she had lived in NY with my dad until he passed in 2014 at almost 91. 

Mom lived to 101. We had celebrated her 100th birthday November 22, 2019 with a small family gathering. Thankfully we got to celebrate that before Covid arrived 4 months later. 

Mildred Mary Arcoro Stapp was a remarkable woman. Born in Brooklyn, NY, she joined the WAVES in 1945 and served her country during WWII in Washington D.C. and then in Hawaii, where she met our Dad (who was from a small town in TX), fell in love and married. One of the joys of going through Mom’s papers in her studio apartment was finding letters of recommendation from her bosses prior to her joining the military, and letters of commendation once she was in the military. Two in particular stand out. One was prior to her joining the military and written by her boss at American Car & Foundry in 1943 stating “This young lady’s work has been so satisfactory that you may be sure that I would do all in my power to keep her with us if it were not for the fact that she desires to enter the service of our country.” Another was written by her commanding officer in Wash. D.C. in December of 1944 to an officer in Hawaii stating that “Miss Arcoro has proven to be a very conscientious and capable worker and, in the event, you have a billet in your organization for a First Class Yeomen, you’d better put in your bid for her now. If John Walter is still with you, I am sure that he will urge you to get your drag net out for Millie without delay.” I chuckled over the language used during that time period. Mom’s twin sister also joined the WAVES and was in Hawaii during that same time. Two remarkable ladies. 

Gary and I spent 3 days cleaning out Mom’s apartment. Initially I found the task overwhelming… being surrounded by her things. Thankfully Gary did not. We gave away what we could, kept some things for various family members, and brought all the papers etc. back to the hotel to go through. It was a joy to be able to read the letters and cards that the family had written to Mom during her last days. Several of those made it into her Celebration of Life. Curiously I did not come across the letter that I had written her… even though I found all the other family members letters (more on that later). 

We had a fun respite on Sunday night, the 7th, watching Tampa Bay, led by Tom Brady, win the Super Bowl. By Monday, Feb. 8th, we had sorted through everything. I was able to visit my cousin Andrea in Exeter, NH and drop a few things off to her and have a nice visit for a few hours. Gary and I also worked on finalizing a 17 minute video tribute of Mom that we had started in TX and were able to finish in NH. I also started thinking about mom’s Celebration of Life service. 

We drove down to NY on Wed., the 10th, and met with the Funeral Director that same afternoon. Thurs., the 11th, my brothers and Linda flew in from NY and we had a chance to catch up, talk about the service the next day, and have dinner together Thursday evening in our hotel room, which had a full kitchen. (On a comical note, the Homewood Suites Hotel in NH also had a full kitchen. But when we arrived, there were no dishes or pots and pans in the kitchen cabinets. I attributed it to Covid and that they had cleared out the kitchen supplies. Luckily Mom still had some dishes, and Gary & I went to Goodwill and purchased a couple of pots and pans. Only later did we realize all the dishes, utensils, pots and pans were in the dishwasher waiting for us to empty them out. Duh. We didn’t make the same mistake in NY at another Homewood Suites Hotel. lol.) 

Covid protocols in NY allowed for one funeral service at a time in the funeral home, maxed out at 25 people, and everyone wearing masks. Our Celebration of Life would be quite small. Five of us in attendance. My brothers, Linda, Gary and I in attendance. The rest of the family would be viewing Mom’s Celebration of Life via live-stream in six different states around the country. My brothers and Linda, who flew directly into NY from TX, had to get Covid tests and fill out a travel form before boarding their flight. Once in NY, they were then subjected to text messages every few hours from the City of NY asking how they were feeling. Since Gary & I had driven down to NY from NH, we weren’t put through the same travel scrutiny. Our Covid test from Galveston had come back negative, although that would have been considered an “old” test by NY standards having been done a week prior to our arrival in the state. 

Because our group was so small, we didn’t have to wear masks in the chapel room of the funeral home. Mom’s Celebration of Life was a family affair. The day of the service, Friday, Feb. 12, our little group arrived early to set up the photos, picture albums, and memorabilia, including a beautiful quilt Nancy, Mom’s friend and caregiver, had made. We were able to sit around informally and share stories and memories of our Mom & Dad. When the live streaming began, we officially began our Celebration of Mom’s Life. We had no outside clergy in attendance. Nor did Mom want us to do a military funeral service for her. She felt because she hadn’t served in harm’s way that she wasn’t deserving. There was no talking her out of that so we abided by her wishes, but circumvented it a bit by reading letters of commendation from her military career. One from the Secretary of the Navy in part read “You have served in the greatest Navy in the world. It crushed two enemy fleets at once, receiving their surrenders only four months apart… No other Navy at any time has done so much. For your part in these achievements, you deserve to be proud as long as you live.”  

We also read letters that the family had sent at the end of Mom’s life talking about their favorite memories of her and how much she meant to them. We read letters from her 30+ year career with GTE, now (Verizon) where she was a Security Administrator and was praised by the Dept. of Defense. We read our own eulogies, and we watched the 17 minute tribute video that Gary (mostly) and I had created. We laughed. We cried. In our eyes, it was the perfect celebration and what she would have wanted. Afterwards we received loving text messages from family members who had watched the service live-streamed. My heart was touched by how many of our family had watched the service from their homes. 

Afterwards on that cold morning we had a short service graveside where the deacon blessed Mom’s casket and where Gary read his touching letter that he’d sent to Mom during her final days. 

In the afternoon we all came back to the hotel to relax and go through the remainder of the letters and photos and sort through them prior to our flights the next day. That evening we shared a family dinner at Mom’s favorite Italian restaurant. Then we all came back to the hotel and played cards for awhile until it was bedtime. It had been a wonderful day.

Saturday, the 13th, we gathered once again and Gary cooked breakfast for all of us. Then Bob left first to catch his flight back to Dallas. Andy & Linda and Gary & I were all flying back to Houston and had the same flight. So the four of us all headed together back to LaGuardia Airport in the rental car with Gary behind the wheel. Let’s just say driving in NY is not for the faint of heart. We got there and couldn’t return the rental car fast enough! 

A funny story… sorry Andy & Linda I have to share! We all arrived at check-in at United Airlines. Gary & I had considerably more luggage than A&L because we’d been up north longer, plus we were bringing a few of Mom’s things back with us. We were in line first with checking our bags and the reservationist finishes with us and and, glancing at A&L, says to Gary & I “what about your parents?” It wasn’t worth correcting her so I just said they had a carry-on and were fine. Of course, we’re all wearing masks so it’s virtually impossible to tell ages, but that moment will stick in family lore!

LaGuardia Airport is under a major renovation. The whole airport is being re-done. We happened to be in the new terminal that’s under construction and it’s gorgeous! When completed LaGuardia will be the first newly constructed U.S. airport in over 25 years. Unbelievable! This country’s infrastructure is abysmal! Among other improvements at LaGuardia, the new terminal has a spectacular waterfall displaying a light show of NY scenes. In addition, airport passengers in certain terminals will be treated to walking on raised pathways with planes passing underneath. It will be something to see!

While sitting at LaGuardia awaiting our flight, we began to get an inkling of the winter weather we were going to be facing upon our return to Texas. We were getting text messages suggesting that bad winter weather was expected in Houston for the next week and we might want to delay our trip. Uh. I don’t think so. According to our calculations, we could get back to Galveston prior to the bad weather setting in. 

We all had an uneventful flight back to Houston. Andy & Linda just had a carry-on bag so we told them to go on ahead back to their vehicle and head back to Galveston. Not to wait on us. They were camping at the same campground we are. We waited in baggage claim for our luggage then caught the shuttle bus back to where we had parked our truck. I handed the bus driver our ticket. It’s door-to-door service… they drop you right at your vehicle. Gary and I were the only ones on the shuttle bus. Great, this won’t take long. Wrong. The driver had a strong Russian accent. She drops us off at where our truck is supposed to be. But, no truck. She looks at the ticket and says “the attendant must have written the number down wrong.” She says “it’s not my fault. I’ll drive you around on this row and the next and you look for your truck.” Oh-kay. Sounds reasonable. We’re driving round and round and round on the bus… but no truck. Now she’s getting a little cranky with us, like we’re not seeing our truck. Finally I look at the ticket that she’s been holding and say to her “The ticket says 243. We’re at parking spot 143.” Oh, she says. Sorry. She takes us over to 243, which is waaaayyyy over on the other side. She’s a little less cranky now. Wish I could say the same. We finally arrive at our truck. 

Driving back to Galveston we’re seeing signs on Houston roadways about the bad weather that will be arriving. But we’re from NH, this is Texas. How bad can it be???? I mean really. We’re pros when it comes to bad weather. We get back to our tiny home, and fall into bed shortly thereafter.  

We wake up the following morning, Sunday, Feb. 14th, and realized we have no food in the house and there’s a storm coming the next day. We get into NH Winter Weather preparedness mode and hit the grocery store Sunday morning before it’s get busy with everybody else doing what we’re doing. It was Valentine’s Day although I don’t think that thought ever crossed our minds. After returning from the grocery store, we unpacked our suitcases, including the items I’d brought back from mom’s apartment, which included a needlepointed pillow I’d made for Mom for Mother’s Day several years ago. I brought it back because I wanted to give it to my Aunt Elizabeth, who lives in Corpus Christi. While I was putting it into the closet, I felt something bulky at the back of it. I reached into the opening where the pillow is, and found folded inside the letter I’d written to my mom in her final days. She’d folded it and tucked it inside. That’s why I couldn’t find it in her apartment. It was like a warm hug across my shoulder. ..

A&L joined us for dinner that evening. We headed off to bed and some time during the night lost electricity. The tell tale beeping of the refrigerator in the middle of the night was our clue. Gary got up and switched the fridge to propane. We didn’t think too much about it thinking the power outage would be short lived. If only! The next morning we woke up to an icy/snowy 1” mix on the ground. We weren’t venturing out anywhere. I don’t like driving in this in NH, and I certainly don’t want to drive in it in Texas where these drivers aren’t used to this type of weather. 

Even with no electricity, we had some lights because of our RV battery and a trickle solar charge on our roof. In addition we had water and propane for heat and cooking. If you have to lose electricity, being in an RV isn’t a bad place to be. We had a fine day getting caught up on emails, phone calls, etc. Gary made a meatloaf for dinner and A&L joined us. 

Tuesday, Feb. 15th, we still don’t have power. Gary and I had dental appointments on Galveston Island that morning. Those appointments were, of course, cancelled because 95% of the island was without power. There was supposed to be “rolling blackouts” across Texas to help manage the power outage. But there’s nothing “rolling” about it here in Galveston. It’s just a blackout. As I think everyone is aware now, Texas, in its infinite wisdom, is the only state in the country that opted to be on its own power grid. They don’t need no stinkin’ help from nobody. Okey dokie then. How’s that workin’ for you now? Or, more importantly, how is that working for the residents of Texas? Some friends were beginning to check on us via email or text. We assured them we were fine. About now was when we lost water. With the prolonged freezing temps, many water lines were bursting all over Texas… Galveston included… so the town had cut off the water to try and eliminate any further damage to power lines. Again, helpful to be in an RV… we had a full supply of fresh water in our holding tank…. 67 gallons worth. Not an infinate supply but a fair amount! We were still able to cook, wash dishes, use showers sparingly, and flush toilets. 

We were even able to watch a little TV … a friend had sent us a link to an episode of Maine Cabin Makers. Her family cabin had been re-done on the show. So cool to see her renovated cabin and see Charlene being interviewed! We also watched Stanley Tucci’s new show on CNN about food in Italy. Way fun to see different regions explored in Italy and the cuisine from those regions. But I digress. 

Linda and Andy had a weak battery so they weren’t getting the heat output they should at their RV. Gary brought them over our portable generator to use which helped.  

Wed., the 17th, still no power and still no water. Gary and I are taking this in stride. While it’s annoying for us, it’s not the end of the world. However, I did quickly realize that homes down here aren’t set up for this. Temps were still frighteningly cold even by northern standards. With electricity out, there is no other heat source for these TX homes… no fire place, no wood stove, and no generators. Water lines were bursting in homes left and right. People can’t keep warm and they can’t even have drinking water. It became a life threatening situation for some across the state. Scary. But we were still ok. 

Since A&L’s RV battery wasn’t working as well as it should, the boys headed out to get a new one at an out supply store in Galveston. Gary forgot his mask and walked into the store covering his face with his shirt. The clerk said “Don’t worry about it. We’ve moved on to the next crisis.” Andy was able to pick up a new battery… cash only since the credit card machines weren’t working.  

At our campground some people were leaving to try and go some place where there was power since there was no inkling when it would be restored. Andy & Linda and Gary and I needed to replenish propane. There is one propane supplier on the island. They were waiting on a propane delivery themselves and said they would post it on Facebook when the shipment came in. I happened to check at the right time and saw they had just received a delivery. We took both our trucks over there and by the time we got in line, there were already 20+ vehicles waiting on the street. We eventually got our turn. I went in to pay and the clerk thanked me for my patience. I said, no, thank you for being open and having such an orderly system. As I was leaving, I heard him radio to the workers outside “our customers say we’re doing a good job.” The four of us were much relieved having full propane tanks. 

Temps were still extremely cold during all of this. We all had big slabs of ice on the cement pads where our RVs were… making it rather treacherous walking outside. Where were those ice cleats when I need them! Oh right, Gary & I gave them away because who thought we’d need them in Texas! 

Thursday, the 18th, Gary and I had routine physicals scheduled which had been cancelled earlier in the week. We are going to have several appointments to re-schedule when all of this is over. Finally, praise be, power came back on about 3 AM Thursday morning and water had returned before that!  Yay! 

Life returned to normal over the next several days. We reached out to family and friends to check in, and I slowly began tackling the admin aspect of Mom’s death… notifying social security, Mom’s attorney, pension holders, credit card companies etc. In some ways, it keeps you busy and moving forward, which is a good thing. 

By Saturday, the 20th, weather had improved and we were able to get a game in of cornhole with Andy & Linda and some of their friends who were staying at our campground. It was nice to do something fun!

The remainder of the week was a mix of doing admin. work surrounding Mom’s death, along with trying to remember to have fun. Mom would have wanted that. After all, she was the one who kept reminding us that when she passed, we were to celebrate her passing. A work in progress. 

Tuesday, the 23rd, we finally took our first walk on the beach since arriving in Galveston. Wednesday we visited the Galveston Railroad Museum. It has one of the largest restored railroad collections in the southwest, and one of the five largest in the country including more than 40 pieces of locomotives and rolling stock. Very cool. And this retired graphic designer loved the collection of vintage railroad posters which won numerous ad awards back in the late 1940s and early ’50s. 

We also had ample opportunity to play a few different games this week with more friends of Andy & Linda who had arrived at our campground. We played cornhole with Joanne & Bob and A&L. We also played the card game Tic. And J&B also introduced us to “Blank Slate” which was a game they had brought with them. We actually ended up purchasing this game for ourselves thinking it could be a fun game for everyone to play while we’re sitting around the campfire at Old Stage on a Saturday night.

On Thursday, Feb. 25th, we visited the Bryan Museum with Joanne & Bob. It’s a museum in Galveston that is housed in an old orphanage. The building itself is beautiful and was badly damaged during the Great Flood of 1900, which remains the deadliest natural disaster and the worst hurricane in U.S. history. Between 6,000 and 12,000 people lost their lives. The building has been rebuilt and is filled with Texas history. Gary and I had visited last year but were interested in going again this year, since the museum was having a special historical Mardi Gras display. That turned out not to be such a great display, which was disappointing since Galveston is known for having the third largest Mardi Gras celebration in the country. Naturally with Covid still present, festivities had been cancelled. 

Earlier in the week Gary and I had printed out a driving map of historic homes in downtown that were supposedly decorated for Mardi Gras…. taking the place of the Mardi Gras parade that was cancelled.  Alas with the ice storm, most of the decorations had not survived. However there are some beautiful homes in Galveston’s historic district. We definitely want to go back and explore on foot further. One of the realities of the ice storm was seeing just about all the palm trees on the island decimated. Hopefully they will recover.

Saturday, Feb. 27th, was a treat! Gary’s former (footwear design) business partner, Ken, now lives in Hawaii. But Ken’s daughter Olivia, son-in-law Cesare, and daughter Celia live in Austin. They came down for a visit. What a great day! I hadn’t seen Olivia since she was probably 18 and I hadn’t seen Celia since she was a baby. She is now all grown up and a gorgeous 23 year old. Just a delight to spend time with this beautiful family! 

This was a nice way to end the month. That and one final cornhole game on Sunday with Andy & Linda and Joanne & Bob before J&B were scheduled to depart the next day. 

It was a month punctuated by loss and challenges, but also great rewards. I’m grateful, as is our family, to have had Mildred Mary Arcoro Stapp in our lives for as long as we did. Her spirit lives on in her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Personally, Gary & I are grateful to have our amazing family and friends in our lives as we move forward through this ever changing journey of life.